Addiction talks in your own voice.

The voice of addiction is a very strong loud voice. It’s a master deceiver and chameleon. The voice of addiction creates many different stories. Some of these are:

I am not an alcoholic; I am just having fun.

I deserve to have a drink, after such a hard week.

This time I won’t let it get out of hand.

I can stop whenever I want, I just don’t want too yet.

People should just mind their own business and not worry about my drinking/drug use.

My kids are too young to even know what’s going on.

My kids are too young to remember that I wasn’t there for their special occasions.

I am a piece of crap and have messed up so badly, I might as well just get really drunk/high.

I am so mad/sad/glad I need to get drunk/high. It’s what people do.

Addiction lies to you in a voice that sounds like your own. It can sound logical because you are used to listening to it. It doesn’t strike you as a lie, or as odd, because you haven’t gotten the awareness you need to discern that it’s not you talking. All these comments above are addiction speaking.

Yes, at some point everyone probably says statements such as these, but the difference isn’t in if you say them. It’s if you say them while drinking and using drugs even though you are facing many negative consequences from your substance use.

Also, because you have not developed alternative coping or life skills and lack emotional regulation from the alcohol damaging your nervous system, these statements and actions are automatic. You feel the absolute need to drink or use. Drinking or drug use commences without any resistance from you.

 Truly, when we are addicted, we drink and drug no matter what the circumstances are. Why? Because it’s what our addicted brain wants us to do. We are driven by our dopamine seeking brains. Substance abuse alters the brain by flooding it with pleasure creating neurotransmitters. It feels wonderful and euphoric. Our brains have a miraculous ability to drive us to repeat actions that make it feel good. Eventually, if we keep using substances long enough, the disease of addiction is born within our brains. When our brain wants to feel good or escape bad feelings, it creates stories to encourage us to drink or consume other drugs. And in that way, addiction lies to us in our own voice with many stories of why it’s ok to pick up a drink or a drug.

If you are seeking recovery, it is imperative to learn how to recognize the lies the disease of addiction is telling you. One way to start doing this is to notice what story you are telling yourself as you are on your way to the liquor store, or to your drug dealer. If it is any of the above stories, it’s a lie.

Another way to start recognizing when your addiction is creating a story to get you to use is by paying attention to how your body feels when you are on your way to drinking or drugging. Feelings of tension signal stress in the body. Feelings of high anticipation can signal that you are looking to make a good feeling or a celebration “better” with substances. Pain in your body can signal that you are in need of taking care of your physical self.

All of the above signals can be handled without alcohol or other drugs. For example, people can do many other things to relieve stress besides using substances. Yoga, meditation, prayer, talking with a friend, working with a counselor, and exercise are all tools you can use for stress reduction. And believe it or not, celebrating can honestly be way more fun without substances, and you get to remember it in the morning, skipping the guilt and shame.

Working with a recovery coach, counselor, or a recovery program will greatly help you to start building awareness around the lies and stories addiction tells you. You can learn more about the tools to use to counter those lies and begin to practice them and build a better life.

 Please contact Tracy Kiesler at freedomtobecoach.com for more information or to schedule a coaching call.